In the summer of 2011, I am going for an elective tummy tuck, and breast reduction. The reason why I am having this done, is because I use to weigh over 345 lbs ( I didn’t have a gastric by-pass). After dropping more then 160 lbs, I became a certified personal trainer. But there are still areas of my body that didn’t bounce back. Those areas are my abdomen, hips and my breasts. I get sores under the folds of skin, and it’s really painful. And my back aches from being large breasted. My insurance is covering part of the cost for the surgery, because I use to be obese. And I will pay the other portion.
Background:
We have two boys that are the life of our life. Our first miracle is 6, and has VERY mild autism, and global delays. Our second miracle just turned 4, and we finalized his adoption in June of 2009. Both boys have developmental issues, that are mild in nature. After being told that I couldn’t have anymore kids, I found out in May that I was 11 weeks pregnant. I am expecting twins girl in early December 2009. I’ve elected to breast-feed my girls, until they are at least a year old. That will be December of 2010. Which means I won’t be able to have my surgery, until the boys are out of school for the summer, in 2011. The recovery period for both of these surgeries is about 8 weeks.
My husband informed me about a week ago, that he will be deploying again, around the time I have surgery. This left me in quite a pickle. My brother and sister-in-law have kindly offered, to take the kids for 8 weeks in the summer. We’ve already hashed out the details. My friend and me will be driving the kids to WA in our 12 passenger van. We will be flying back a few days later. I have several friends that are nurses, and they have all offered to help take care of me. I am truly blessed in this aspect.
Problem:
But I have another situation now that I have to deal with. My husbands mother and sister constantly call my husband for money. My mil and sil live together. My mil works full-time and my sil gets SSI. Between the two of them, they make more then enough money to support themselves. My sister in law calls me "greedy, stupid, a manipulator, a BAD mother, and a money hoarder". The ONLY reason why she calls me these things, is because I cut off the debit card that my mother in law had to our savings account. Back in 2002, my sil decided to sneak into my mil’s purse, took out the debit card, and helped herself to our money.The debit card was for EMERGENCY use only. My mil had to call my hubby to make sure it was ok first. My sil lied to my mil about it, when I confronted her about it. I cut off all of their access to our money. This made them both very angry, but I can’t have my sil dipping her hands into money that isn’t hers.
My mil and sil have both said to my husband that my elective surgery is a "waste" of HIS money? And I should be "ashamed" of trying to better my self-image! Well what those two twits don’t know is that I’ve been working 2 jobs for the last 2 years, and saving a good amount of the money for the surgeries. I had to quit my personal trainer job, at the beginning of July due to pre-term contractions. My doctor put me on modified bed rest, I am currently working from home, making a fair amount of money. Once the twins are 6 weeks old, I will be going back to working, as a personal trainer part-time. I’m tired of them calling the money that my husband and I earn "family money". They say they should have access to our money any time they want. Which my husband and me will NEVER allow them access to again. They think me and my husband are made of money, which we are not.
Hubby has told his mother and sister time and again, that all of our money is for our family. He even told his lazy sister to get a job if she wants more money, and she actually said, "Why should I, when I can get it from you?" This really angered my husband. Those two know that we are going to have 4 children to feed, clothe, and educate instead of two. But they still keep calling for money. Why can’t these two understand that my husband doesn’t have ATM written across his forehead?
We’re at our wits end with my mil and sil. Does anyone have any relatives like this? If so, what did you do?